Ego

 I just wanted to touch on the subject of EGO.

I was reading this book recently and there were so many a-ha moments, I was just enthralled. Absolutely captivated that someone was able to put into words exactly how I felt and why I felt that way.

Example being, I get so nervous when giving a reading, I don't do it often because I get so anxious and nervous that I have trouble focusing on what I'm getting. Why do I get so nervous? Because I'm afraid of being Wrong! Afraid of looking stupid. 

Let me reiterate, I am afraid of being wrong. That is my ego. Pure ego. I thought that my fear was the opposite, turns out it's not. I don't need to be in the picture, I know it's not about me But it's not as easy to put that into action. Letting go of that need to be right opens you up to just feeling, sensing, hearing, seeing, etc. You can experience more of what's going on in and around you when you fully open to whatever comes through, even if it's not your chosen way of receiving. 

I remember I had gotten so used to clairvoyantly seeing and that was my confirmation that someone was there, besides sensing someone there. I really downplayed the fact that I could sense someone there First and just Knew they were young/old, man/woman, tall/short, etc. The sensing and knowing always came first but I didn't trust it until I could SEE it. Even then, I had doubts. Then eventually I began to hear and not see as much. Spirits way of helping me progress.

I still have doubts but when I hear an accent, I know that's not something I would randomly come up with, plus Im pretty good at picking up on accents based on my travels. Spirit uses your own knowledge and vocabulary so - makes sense. I always thought it was strange though, sometimes they sound like my own inner voice and sometimes it's strikingly foreign with accents and tones, inflections and laughter. Each personality is different.

Anywho, the author talked about how ego shows itself in different ways and once you recognize these cues, you can learn to push them aside and let go of expectations.

I know it'll take time for me to learn to get past my competitive nature, to be better at something than others, show that I can excel and prove that I'm capable. To get past the- how come I'm not there yet and why can't I get information like that? It's not hard. 

The only thing stopping me...is Me. Learn to get out of my own way and not be afraid of being wrong, it's all part of learning. The misses are just as powerful as the hits, if not more so. They are a lesson that we all have to learn, discernment.

Ive been ready for some time, to walk this path. I am capable and I have the strength and knowledge to move forward. I will be comfortable doing a reading for anyone, confidently and with compassion.

I know when I come back and read this, it might not sound like my words, I believe that occasionally, we channel inspiration from a higher source/guides, what have you and they're meant to inspire us and guide us in a positive way. The words can enlighten and uplift and some days, we need to hear them. Some days, they're meant to be revisited. As a reminder and a message we need to hear.